HAPPY VETERAN'S DAY!

 "Thank you for your service." For many Vietnam War veterans, this gracious sentiment came a little too late as did "Welcome Home". But eventually, they were seen to be more than drugged-out hippies. Amongst many veterans of other wars the idea that they would never turn their backs on another group of veterans became orthodoxy. And I think it was because of the swell of emotions that came after the 911 attacks that Americans began to take a more serious look at the treatment of veterans of a war that so many thought was an anomaly despite how the Korean War concluded. Thankfully, the incompetence shown in Iraq and Afghanistan made it clear that many died for mismanaged causes just as they did in Vietnam.

Despite how politicized the Vietnam War had become, I didn't have any question as to my duty to serve. So joining the Army during a time of war was hardly questioned. Besides my father, who landed on Omaha Beach at Normandy, there were other relatives and men who were veterans. I was raised in a quiet patriotism. I still didn't think going to Vietnam was a privilege. It was just what you did if you were ordered. Interestingly, the only thing my father ever said to me before going to Vietnam was, "You're not going to like it." 

Well, that was about right. The war was enough but there were things going on like the drugs, the fragging, the friendly fire, those who liked to misuse their rank, the racism, the thievery, and even the murder of a Red Cross worker. They were called "Donut Dollies". I was excluded from the investigation due to the color of my hair. Yet still, I could name quite a few good things about Nam and afterward. But in the end, it was obvious that I didn't like the Army life. However, that didn't stop me from caring. 

Vietnam Veterans had varied experiences when they came home. Generally they were negative and they were that way for many years. So many family and friends had to bury their Vietnam loved ones in silence due to growing opposition. As a parent, I can not imagine what that experience was like. Some returnees had or eventually experienced PTSD. Even after the VA attempted treatment, it still didn't prevent continued suicides and the inability to engage life.

Iraq and Afghanistan veterans began their service in a flurry of support due to 911 but after multiple tours, it was obvious that they were getting screwed despite their hope of changing a backward country, especially for the women and children living under a maniacal religious patriarchy. The way we left the area was proof that those in charge had no idea of what to do even though the same situation had occurred in the Vietnam withdrawal.

For many veterans, the only real heroes are the ones who died. An indelible image for me is the American flag draped coffin being unloaded at an Air Force or Army base because it always reminded me of the containers that held the casualties at the 12th Evac in Cu Chi. They were picked up as needed by an helicopter and taken to where the bodies could be processed for their return to the states.

Like so many holidays, Veterans's Day at times has often been relegated to little more than time off from work. In more recent years, there have been a sincere efforts to acknowledge and focus on the rightful place of veterans as well as those who are currently serving. But let me say this. For me, there is no such thing as "Happy Veterans' Day!" I can not be that happy about making it back knowing how many didn't or eventually died from their wounds at a stateside military hospital or at the VA. I can not be happy about the patriotic Vietnamese who were left to deal with the communists. I can not be happy about the Paris Peace Accords, the evacuation, nor the boat people. 

But most of all, as with many wars, it is the military, political, media and/or religious lies that create the fog of war or as several insightful minds over time have similarly said, "The first casualty of war is truth." But this maybe changing if we can question a war but still have support and be grateful for all who serve and especially those who gave the ultimate sacrifice.

TURN OUT THE GASLIGHT, THE PARTY IS OVER

It started with the crowd size at the inauguration of 45, the guy who is smarter than most (so everyone is saying), all the way to the Big Lie which he just described as "the crime of the century" despite there being at least a couple more years before you could reasonably make that determination. Of course, by the end of the century, they might not have finished the 2020 election recount. In this everything is a conspiracy world, gaslighting has become acceptable, especially by those who have a history of believing in the reality of things aren't as they appear. The trouble is that you can plug in just about anY comfortable notion ...and there are plenty who have. They may be just momentary or cover the expanse of eternity. They may come in completed packages or fundamental foundations whose final appearance depends on evolving developments. 

The important thing about gaslighting is whether you are the GASLIGHTER (not to be confused by the old lamplighter of long, long ago) or the GASLIGHTEE or BOTH. Historically, I think this technique was more an individual exercise rather than a group. But it seems as if the Republican Party's herd mentality has elevated it to a whole new level. This is not my father's Republican Party of Lincoln and Eisenhower whose ideology ran along the lines of freedom, anti-communism, conservative spending (except for the military), pro law enforcement, and the like. Apparently, this has been breaking down over some time but it really broke down under the evil genius they feel can keep them in power. For me it was disparaging POW'S and other military that showed a hatred for those who were true heroes like John McCain and those who landed at Normandy. My other point would be, who to hell is he to judge anyone?

But for the current Republicans to join into the madness and have some of the greatest flip-flops, gaslighting, redistrictings, voter suppressions and demonizations in political history makes me believe that their obsession is equal to Gollum's in Lord of the Rings which is truly precious. When you are at a point where you will do or say most anything, I suspect you've lost the big picture altogether. The utter lies and hypocrisies are justified or become part of the new norm. No apology necessary. When they can push out one of the most conservative people because she stood for the truth about the election, even with the Dark Lord's blood coursing though her veins, shows a real lack of interest in preserving the American political ethos unless it's the underbelly that no one wants to talk about for at least a hundred years.

Americans love conspiracies. On some days you can hear at least 6 or 7 different ones at our local CO-OP. Couple these with how people feel about other people and you can more easily believe that our peaceful transition of power is in jeopardy, along with a few other things. Are we at a point where we don't believe the truth because it doesn't fit our agenda or that it puts our enemies in a better light or it is automatic when it comes to those we hate unless it's something to their detriment)? Without some reason, some thought, some fact finding ...and some polygraphs, we are letting the goal of a more perfect union slip away. If the majority of Republicans can't support a bi-partisan commission to investigate the Jan 6 debacle, it's a good sign that they believe the gaslight is still lit.

PLACED INTO TIME OUT

Well, it wasn't exactly time out. It just felt that way. You see, I just got out of rehab. ...No! Not that kind! I was in a medical rehab getting back on my feet after shoulder surgery and other set backs. But perhaps both kinds are similar, especially when it comes to pain. As the common wish for many is to have the suffering magically go away rather than having to deal with stark reality. My total time out so far has been one month and three weeks of trying to maintain a zen-like stance in almost every situation. Sometimes that seemed impossible to do, but it was usually for the better. Admittedly however, I did have a couple moments when I was a bit less than my usual charming self.

Being at home in the city now is almost surreal. In rehab I was on a lockdown unit where I couldn't have visitors and then further I was in isolation part of that time. So just being reunited with my best friend "Mac" is awkward, especially sense I can only type with one hand. Despite everything, we are slowly getting back to where we were before. He saved a lot of interesting items from what I missed during my time out. I suspect some of those will always seem quite beyond the little world I had made for myself. ...In a way, I'm sorta glad about that.  

Even with another surgery yet to go, I don't expect too much more time out. I hope this extended journey ends with a permanent return to the mystical solitude (i.e. isolation) of my little farmhouse on the prairie. At that point, I suspect what I'm grateful for in the whole experience will easily surpass the less than grateful. But given what so many have been going through and the horrendous number who have been ultimately lost, I felt like I was taking up space and resources. 

Life so often is an odd juxtaposition of a flow between "normalcy" and extra-ordinary events whether small or large, lasting a short time or for a long while. Disruption happens, as well as ignored chronic conditions. Predictability and planning are too easily seen as the usual or the expected. So when something interferes, makes us change direction or completely blocks us, we are faced with new challenges and decisions. As someone has so aptly said, "The only thing you can depend on is change. And it's apt to occur when we are quite contented with our lives." It does seem that we either learn to deal with our own reality or risk ending up in a time out of our own making.